Love for Unborn Babies

When I was a kid, all I wanted was to grow up and make babies.  At one point in time, I had a list of 24 names for my prospective children.  (The father of said children was going to have to be rich and very accepting....  lol)
And then I grew up...
Funny how that happens and 24 kids suddenly becomes a terrifying number...  But I still wanted a baby!
I got married just as soon as I could and we started trying, but month after month, no baby.
This I know was a blessing from God after I left him and realized I had been in an abusive marriage.
Soon after, I met a karate instructor and started taking self defense lessons, then started dating.  After about a year we discovered we were expecting a baby.  We were both so excited!  We told our families and started looking at baby stuff.
We were planning how this new addition to our family was going to change everything.
And then entirely too soon, God took my baby to be with Him in heaven.
I don't know why and there is nothing that anyone can say to make it feel better or to change how I feel.  I cannot 'just get over it' as some people would like me to do.
As soon as I knew that there was this little tiny life inside of me, I felt an unconditional love that will last the rest of my life.
I never got to hold my baby in my arms, but I felt her in my heart.
One of the best conversations I had after my miscarriage was with one of my cousins who had a miscarriage.  The general idea was whatever you are feeling is normal.  Feel it.  It is ok.  And if you ever need to talk, I am here.
To be told that it is ok to grieve, no matter how small the life that is lost, was huge!   Every one had been telling me to just get over it up until that point or just avoiding the issue entirely.
It is difficult, so hard.  To feel that love inside of you, to want something so bad and then feel it draining out of you, unable to stop it.
It took years before I could hear about a pregnancy in my family without jealousy or tears.  Even longer before I could walk through the infant section of a store, then the toddler section.
Each and every one of these babies deserves our love.  I know God had His reason for taking my baby from me and He did it with love and I can love Him for it.
Today, take a moment and say a prayer for an unborn baby, may he or she live forever in heaven.  Amen.